You lot will never guess where I went at the weekend! Bodiam Castle! I went in through the front entrance (oo-err!), walked into the left hand corner and found myself in the season 5 clue room! I'll get a picture of the one I mean soon, but I was surprised when I recognised it! Heh heh heh! The only...

It's not the bribes themselves I'm talking about, it's just that the way they're done is implausible. As soon as the guard has the bar of gold, there's nothing to stop him attacking the dungeoneer anyway. And seeing that Lord F or Mogdred will be angry if they find out that the guard has accepted a...

Does Lord Fear have a seat in Parliament? If the Mines of Gore were linked to Dunshelm Castle by a short dwarf tunnel, why didn't adventurers just go straight down there-- bypassing Level 1 and 2? Because the Knightmare quests were to test challengers for knightly qualities. Sending them straight d...

I'm working my way through the whole set of seasons and am currently on season 5 (episode 12, I think). I was thinking, 'ah, season 8 isn't going to be up to much, that's a shame - the marathon will end in a downer'. But from your writeup it seems that maybe I've been pessimistic in that view. I loo...

...and chapter 3 is now up! The final one, the end confrontation! Hope you enjoy reading it as much as I did writing it! If anyone wants any more fanfiction from me, please do let me know. I've got several fandoms I intend to write for but I enjoyed this one. Just drop me a line (or, even better, a ...

Is it Ah Wok's mobile emporium itself that plays that would-be oriental music when it's being rolled around? Not exactly. Hidden within his emporium is one of those bathing macaques. He sits in a hot tub and, when the emporium is carted along, he reaches across to a lever and turns it like one of t...

Drassil wrote:
More Ultimate Knightmare Riddles welcome.

Alright, then

Re: series 4 and 5. Why is half the cast from Dorset all of a sudden, when Dunshelm is supposed to be in up north? We have Pixel, Oakley and the boatman, all with distinct West Country accents. Pourquoi?

Dungeoneer cornered by goblins, apparently completely unable to escape.

"They call me Cuban Pete, I'm the king of the rhumba beat, when I sing I go chick-chicky-boom, chick-chicky-boom, chick-chicky-boom!"

Quit Smoking in 7 Days by Owen Improving the Harmony of a Multi-Elemental Society - complete with audio version by a skull-haunting You Too Can Overcome Extreme Ticklishness by the automaton Get Away from That Wall! 10 Tips For Effective Mingling at a Party by Golgarach Awesome by Default by Sylves...

The man from Del Monte. *Whistles innocently* Jonathan the dungeoneer walked a few more steps and then came to a halt. "Where am I?" he asked. "You're in what looks like a shop - a fruit shop - and there's a man in a... Hawaiian shirt, and, erm... flip-flops. And he's arranging some ...

HStorm wrote: When they're asleep, why do cavernwights make noises like the catacombite?

Have you seen those trunks? Anything with a nose like that is going to snore like an old tractor.

I know that, early in season 3, we met Motley and Treguard told us that he was Folly's replacement, but was there ever more information on what happened to Folly?

Want to be my spin doctor?

Nah. I could never get used to the underwear.

Wait a minute! I've got the most splendid idea! If everybody who gets aggressive in pubs did that then there'd be no violence in high streets up and down the country on a Friday and Saturday night, right? The NHS would save money and everything! If we can get today's impressionable youth to watch K...