Knightmare.com

How many Knightmare fans does it take to change a lightbulb?
Only one. Faaaaaaaaaaaar too much intelligence and good taste to require more.

No, it's not funny, but I still think most people on the forum will like it anyway.

Love it!

Where did the hun drop his biscuit when he was told that he couldn't have children?

In Fatilla tea.

Liking it!

Wow, 11 years since I first made this thread! That was nearer to the show's run than to the present day.

Let me see if I can think of a new Knightmare joke…

Man goes to the doctor: "Doctor, doctor! There's something seriously wrong with me. First, all my hair fell out, then I started losing my skin, and now even my bones are crumbling away!"

"Don't worry," says the Doctor, "I've seen this on Knightmare. As long as you have one eyeball left, you'll be fine. Here, have a banana."

Or how about…

Eddie Van Halen recently released a pop album, but fans hated it, forcing him to return to his musical roots. Eddie was quoted as saying: "Rock I was, rock I now become."

GrandDizzy wrote:Man goes to the doctor: "Doctor, doctor! There's something seriously wrong with me. First, all my hair fell out, then I started losing my skin, and now even my bones are crumbling away!"

"Don't worry," says the Doctor, "I've seen this on Knightmare. As long as you have one eyeball left, you'll be fine. Here, have a banana."

GrandDizzy wrote:Eddie Van Halen recently released a pop album, but fans hated it, forcing him to return to his musical roots. Eddie was quoted as saying: "Rock I was, rock I now become."

Which music album is Pickle getting for Christmas?

Elvish Presley's Greatest Hits.

What time does Hordriss touch himself?
When the big hand's on one.

What did Treguard say to the polygamist?
"This is no game of numerous wives."

What do you get if you cross Elita with Skarkill?
A gob hobblin'.

What's the difference between Hordriss at the end of Series 5 and Red Death at the end of Series 6?
One "moves with grace and speed", the other with space and greed.

Why is a loaf baked at the entrance to Level 2 so polite?

Because it's well bread.

What do you get if you cross Ariadne with Raptor?
A webinar.

What's the difference between the technomagic embedded in Lord Fear's viewscreen, and Smirkenorff's dragonmints?
One's firmware, the other's wyrm fare.

After Series 6 Quest 3, why didn't Heggatty give Greystagg the contents of the Genoese box of delights?
She was already an eye owner.