Knightmare.com

Melisandrinoff, welcome to your new home.

Allow me to take you on a guided tour. We'll start with the basement.

This is where I store those who do not acknowledge my rule. You'll notice the many bones around. That nest in the corner is where Nibbler lives, he does like barbecued meat.

The Great Hall is simply where my front door is and some stairs leading up. To the right is the Reception room and the Disco room.

To the left are the Kitchens and the Dining Room.

The second floor contains several of my more specialist rooms. Over there is Motley's padded cell, he spends a lot of time there. Next door is Skarkill's room, I really don't want to know what he gets up to in there.

Opposite is errrrr.....my special room. Don't go in there, It's for private things. That door leads to the smoking room, It contains my electric chair. There is the door to nowhere, I wouldn't go in there, my last girlfriend did, never seen again.

The third floor houses my immense bedroom and several smaller Guestrooms. Feel free to explore them all.

Finally, this is the tower. It's where we shall run our evil Empire from. Notice the mirror. It allows me to see any part of the Dungeon I wish.

Now, let me show you back to my bedroom. You might like to inspect and try out the bed, It's far more comfortable with two people

Right, That should do it. Nice long one to celebrate my 50th post.

*gives Semtex Jack a bowl of cake and icecream and a party hat* Happy 50th !

Wow, Semtex Jack, I think I will have fun living here! I'm especially loving the disco room I like a man who has a special room put aside for the pursuit of campness!
Hmm, don't think I'll be going near Skarkill's room, the mind really does boggle unpleasantly when one considers what he might get up to in there...
I am very intrigued by your special room there, I might have to inspect that when you go out to buy milk...er, I mean, I will of course respect your privacy at all times my dear Semtex Jack
Ah, the tower, the heart of our power - the mirror, very cool, I like to spy, I mean keep an eye on our fellow dungeon-lovers.
But, one question...where is *my* bedroom? Oh, I'm sorry, I see you have an 'immense' bedroom - no problem then, I'm sure there will be room enough for us both - do you mind if my pet, Carrie, comes along? She's not as unfriendly as she seems, and she has gorgeous eyes - not that anyone can usually get close enough to see them without, well, becoming incapable of seeing anything ever again, but I'm sure she'll be fine with you.
Thank you for inviting me - I'm sure our union will be a successful one

Thanks moana. The ice cream was very much appreciated.

Melisandrinoff. Of course. The pursuit of campness is paramount. I'm hoping to set up a mirror ball on the level 1 causeway, turning the level 2 clue room into a cinema showing nothing but Priscilla, Queen of the desert and the Corridor of Blades will now become the Corridor of Daffodils.

Your bedroom is of course the same as mine. I can think of a few games we can play in there......

.....Monopoly, The Game of Life, Skewer the Dungeoneer. Dozens of options.

Carrie would be welcome but we'll have to see if she gets on with Nibbler first.

Our union has begun!

What I get up to is I tortuer my prisoners in there.


"HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE........LOVELY."

By the way your Semtexship........errr Lordship can I have my room soundprofed only there screams of pain are lost in these thin walls and it's not as enjoyable.

*Sighs* Skarkill, I'm starting to wonder if it is cost effective to have you around. Your invoices last month for new irons, new pokers, new whips, new chains, a furnace, the electric chair, your paddles recovering and that Hanson CD cost me a small fortune!

Very well, I shall have the room sound-proofed but only on the condition that myself and Melisandrinoff (I really need a shorter pet name for you dear) can borrow the whip and some irons.

I'll more then make up for it though, when you need me to. I'm worth every penny

"HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE.........LOVELY."


"That's fine yer Semtexship...errrr Lordship."

"You an Misstrtess Melisan... err Meli, Malisan, Mel, Mal. Well your Misstress can borow my Toys when ever you like."

I trust you shall be Skarkill. Mel and I have very high hopes for you.

I have received warning that there is a Dungeoneer loose in Level 2. Be a good fellow and bring him to me..

Actually. Just take him straight to the basement and 'introduce' him to Nibbler, he could do with a good meal.

"HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE."

"Don't worry your Lordship."

"I'll have the little pest back her for Breakfest with you an your Mistress."

"Grippa, Rhark. I've got three things to say to yers."

"Dungoneer, Level 2, FETCH."

*Grippa and Rhark scurry off sounding there Horns as they go.*

"HEHEHEHEHEHE......LOVELY."

Excellent Skarkill. I hope you have more success with this one than most of the others.

If your little friends manage to bring back the filthy human child then you shall be well rewarded.

Hmmmm. My mirror shows me that this particular child may proove to be a problem for us. I think I'd prefer it if you handled this personally.

Bring him to me....if you fail....you will find things most Un-Lovely for the next few weeks. I think an intimate introduction with your own toys should be punishment enough.

*Skarkill hurries off.*


*Couple of minutes later.*

"Here' yer gose yer Lordship one Dungnoneer. Hunted down, Capture and Manicaled for yer."

*Skarkill holds up a Struggaling 12 year old in Irons.*

Hmmmmmm.

Skarkill, I must say I'm impressed. This one does look particularly nasty.

Now, what to do with it?

Ah, I know. Skarkill, get the wheel.

*Skarkill hurries off and returns seconds later with a large pink wheel surrounded by flashing lights*

Thankyou my manicle obsessed friend.

Now Dungeoneer, you're real name matters not, as you can see the wheel is split up into equal sections. This one shows Melisandrinoff, this one me, next to it is your captor Skarkill, Then Motley, This one is Nibbler and this tiny little section here represents your freedom.

Skarkill, you may spin the wheel and decide the fate of this whelp!

"HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE..............LOVELY."

*Skarkill spins the wheel.*

"Rouns an Round it gose were it stops, nobody knows. BUT IT AIN'T GONER BE GOOD FOR YOU."

*The wheel slows down and comes to a stop on.......Skarkill*

You sure you didn't cheat my wheel? Bah. The luck is yours today.

Very well, take him away and do with him what you will. Be quick though. I have a new mission for you, my most loyal of servants.

*A Very sadistic smile appers on Skarkill's face.*

"Come on my little playmate. Lets go and.......play."


*Skarkill manhandales the dungeoneer over to the steps.*

"Carefull its a long way down."

*Skarkill pushes the kid who dissapers down the stone steps with a scream of terror, followed by the sound of breaking bones.*

"HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE.........LOVELY."