Knightmare.com

Wraith/Automatum equates to Paul Merton and the Tub of Lard......Oh yes! I see this working well!

"This week, to my right, I have Lucifer with a bottle of milk, as Ruke was unable to make it."

*falls off chair laughing*

"Automaton...have you been downloading porn again?"

One time you could have on of the team heads could be the host because Paul Merton did that.

We should do one of these for, They think it's all over, It is now.

Lord Fear wrote: One time you could have on of the team heads could be the host because Paul Merton did that.

We should do one of these for, They think it's all over, It is now.

Euch! I ain't touching that show!

Yeah, plus the only sport in KM is probably 'Dungeoneer Hunting'.

Here's what I thought might be good for the Knightmare version of Have I Got News for you.

Host: Someone Random.

Team 1: Treguard (Regular) + Someone Random.

Team 2: Lord Fear (Regular) + Someone Random.

The Host and second member for each team changes each episode while the Regulars stay each episode.

Could you Imagine LF and Greystagg on the same team or Treguard and Lillith?

Yeah disaster ! That, I believe would be as bad as Lord Fear and Lissard or even Lissard/Marta on the same team. Anyway Kieran, if Merlin was the producer, the'd never get the show done on time !

Very true. I can see Merlin as host though. I mean, if Boris Johnson can host the show anyone can.

I can see Brother Mace doing well as host - he had some good one-liners ("I sit here in my lonely cell, and I contemplate the follies of the wide world. And I also drink a lot of ale.").

If the next RPG team does this, add in some games from I'm Sorry I Haven't A Clue - Historical Headlines (suggesting how certain newspapers might report events from Knightmare, e.g. the Guardian corrections and clarifications: yesterday's headline, "Lord Fear sends drag queen to castle" should have read "Lord Fear sends dragon in parcel", or the Daily Mail: "Trolls cause destruction - no Britons hurt"), Stars in their Ears (singing well-known songs in the style of Knightmare characters), Salesmen of the Century (two people improvise roles as Knightmare characters while two others implausibly try to sell them things) etc.

Also, if any of you can do decent (or half-decent) impressions of any Knightmare characters or Dead Ringers favourites, I've written some Dead Ringers-inspired skethces and prank call ideas (e.g. William Hague ringing Tim Child to ask him to confirm or deny a rumour that a new series of Knightmare is forthcoming in the hope that there might be a part for him, ideally some sort of cross between Lord Fear and Sylvester Hands [thinking he could be very good as a balding, scheming crook who leads the Oposition and plots to take over the realm but is drunken, ugly, thoroughly disreputable, universally derided, never able to make up his mind about how to deal with his opponents and more of a hindrance than a help to the Opposition and had only one brief success in four years]) that you may wish to look at for a few seconds before rejecting out of hand . Pooka can vouch for their quality or lack thereof.

Of course, for inaccurate links, endless website addresses and what is known in the business as 'sheer f[BLEEP!]-upness', I see only one choice for the role of HIGKFY presenter...

'And now the Missing Words round, containing one or more headlines from our guest publication, the AstroFARM Fanzine.'

Heh. I still think he'd do a better job than Boris Johnson though.

Ideas are noted, we may have time to do it in the Summer as part of the post-RPG6 project list....Is very appealing.

Boris "ha, ha, ha, richly comic i say i say I say" Johnson is a legend. Let it be sung throughout the ages.

"Hordriss had many hits, not all of them involving his wife..."

*b'ding*

Hugo Myatt should present an episode of Have I Got News For You! Genius!