The thinnest books in the Dunshelm Library

For all the comedians out there.
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HStorm
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The thinnest books in the Dunshelm Library

Post by HStorm » Mon Jan 12, 2004 6:58 pm

Memory Games by Merlin the Magnificent.

All My Funny Gags by Motley the Jester.

The Art Of Diplomacy by Elita the cavern elf.

Learn Self-Restraint by Pickle the wood elf.

The Hordriss Book Of Humility.

My Great Rescues by Sir Hugh de Witless.

My Tips For Making An Honest Living by Julius Scaramonger.

The University Portfolio of Sylvester Hands.

My Life In The Spotlight by Gibbet.

Everything I Know About Speaking English Fluently by Majida the genie.


Can anyone think of some more?
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[i][Re: The thinnest books in the Dunshelm Library

Post by GrimaldineGrimwold » Mon Jan 12, 2004 8:38 pm

The Encyclopaedia of Wit by Mogdred

The Meaning of Life and the Universe by Fatilla the Hun

How to Make Friends and Influence People by Grimwold

The Big Book of Etiquette by Sylvester Hands

How to Write You Own Bestseller by Brother Ernest Strange

Of course, the number one untouched book in the Dunshelm Library is Brother Strange's Proverbs.
Last edited by GrimaldineGrimwold on Mon Jan 12, 2004 8:42 pm, edited 1 time in total.
"Sometimes of the Grey, but always of the Green, dearie. Shurrup Brollachan! Have you seen Festus, my dear? I need to take him back to Cornwall. " [cackle]

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Re: The thinnest books in the Dunshelm Library

Post by HStorm » Mon Jan 12, 2004 8:41 pm

I just KNEW someone would paraphrase How To Win Friends And Influence People somewhere in this!
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Re: The thinnest books in the Dunshelm Library

Post by GrimaldineGrimwold » Mon Jan 12, 2004 8:43 pm

I just KNEW someone would paraphrase How To Win Friends And Influence People somewhere in this!
But at least I did it deliberately. It annoys a friend of mine totally when I say it, so I carry on with it. One day I guess I will forget the real string. Ho hum.
"Sometimes of the Grey, but always of the Green, dearie. Shurrup Brollachan! Have you seen Festus, my dear? I need to take him back to Cornwall. " [cackle]

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Re: The thinnest books in the Dunshelm Library

Post by HStorm » Mon Jan 12, 2004 8:45 pm

How To Develop A Relaxed Attitude For Meeting New People by Velda.

Advanced Aerobics Techniques by Caspar the Key.

Grimaldine's Tips On How To Avoid Losing A Wall Monster

Speed Up Your Short Hand Typing by Golgarach.

Open And Honest by Door-is.

The Charitable Works Of A Giving Gentleman by Sylvester Hands.
Last edited by HStorm on Tue Jan 13, 2004 12:50 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: The thinnest books in the Dunshelm Library

Post by GrimaldineGrimwold » Mon Jan 12, 2004 8:47 pm

How to Kick You Habits by Brother Sebastian Mace

You Too Can Lose Weight by the same author.

Award Winning Acting in 10 Easy Steps by Velda

Pet Care Illustrated by Mrs. Enid Grimwold
"Sometimes of the Grey, but always of the Green, dearie. Shurrup Brollachan! Have you seen Festus, my dear? I need to take him back to Cornwall. " [cackle]

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Re: The thinnest books in the Dunshelm Library

Post by HStorm » Mon Jan 12, 2004 8:51 pm

Ways To Maintain Your Modesty by Marta the serving maid.
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Re: The thinnest books in the Dunshelm Library

Post by HStorm » Mon Jan 12, 2004 8:53 pm

Dress To Thrill by Mogdred.

The Strain Of Overwork by Raptor.

Secrets Of Younger-Looking Skin by Mildread.
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Re: The thinnest books in the Dunshelm Library

Post by Skarkill » Mon Jan 12, 2004 9:06 pm

The Goblin Masters Handbook: by Skarkill


Snapper-Jack's Brain Buster Riddles: By Snapper-Jack.


Perfect Elaqution in 10 easy Steps: By Lissard.


The wisdom and Wit of Bollracan: By The Bollracan


Mastering Miremen: By Raptor


You, Me and Bhal-Sheba: By Bhal & Sheba.


How to cook a Dungeoneer: By Mildread
Last edited by Skarkill on Mon Jan 12, 2004 9:06 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: The thinnest books in the Dunshelm Library

Post by GrimaldineGrimwold » Mon Jan 12, 2004 9:15 pm

My Collected Scripts by Festus the Quasi-Canine

The signed copy in the Dunshelm Library is somewhat chewed, so please handle with care.
Last edited by GrimaldineGrimwold on Mon Jan 12, 2004 9:16 pm, edited 1 time in total.
"Sometimes of the Grey, but always of the Green, dearie. Shurrup Brollachan! Have you seen Festus, my dear? I need to take him back to Cornwall. " [cackle]

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Re: The thinnest books in the Dunshelm Library

Post by GrimaldineGrimwold » Mon Jan 12, 2004 9:19 pm

Grimaldine's Tips On How To Avoid Losing A Wall Monster
Hehe.

Preface:

I received a severe Brollaching from my fellow green clad wizards when I lost mine, so now learn from my mistakes and you'll never have to enter a filthy Dungeon to retrieve...
Last edited by GrimaldineGrimwold on Mon Jan 12, 2004 9:21 pm, edited 1 time in total.
"Sometimes of the Grey, but always of the Green, dearie. Shurrup Brollachan! Have you seen Festus, my dear? I need to take him back to Cornwall. " [cackle]

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Re: The thinnest books in the Dunshelm Library

Post by HStorm » Mon Jan 12, 2004 9:21 pm

Mogdred's Guide To Writing More Original Bad-Guy Dialogue.

Miremen Tips On How To Improve Your Co-Ordination

Improve Your Running Speed by the Cavernwights.
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Re: The thinnest books in the Dunshelm Library

Post by GrimaldineGrimwold » Mon Jan 12, 2004 9:29 pm

The Complete Dictionary of All Things Magical by Sidriss the Stupid

Optimism- The Key to Unlocking a Fulfilling Life - By Dooris the Door
Last edited by GrimaldineGrimwold on Mon Jan 12, 2004 9:30 pm, edited 1 time in total.
"Sometimes of the Grey, but always of the Green, dearie. Shurrup Brollachan! Have you seen Festus, my dear? I need to take him back to Cornwall. " [cackle]

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Re: The thinnest books in the Dunshelm Library

Post by HStorm » Mon Jan 12, 2004 9:45 pm

Heh heh, that's a much better door monster one than the one I invented. Take a bow, you witty young thing you!!

The De Witless Guide To Identifying A Damsel in Distress.
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Re: The thinnest books in the Dunshelm Library

Post by GrimaldineGrimwold » Mon Jan 12, 2004 9:49 pm

My Best Carpentry Tips and Tactics by Oakley the Tree Troll

Love is All You Need by Mogdred and his pet Quail.  
"Sometimes of the Grey, but always of the Green, dearie. Shurrup Brollachan! Have you seen Festus, my dear? I need to take him back to Cornwall. " [cackle]

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