New Knightmare (based on the youth football rules)

[rachelesque]

reasonably-light-hearted.
not sure if it's best here or the general discussion forum.

there has (seriously) been talk about making youth football a game with no losers. if someone manages to score a goal then the goal is discounted and the player is substituted off.

this is so 'everyone gets a chance to play' and kids don't get upset at losing.

now, imagine they brought knightmare back and the government decided they needed to bring political correctness in.

things that may happen:

** the oppposition win - the head of the opposition has to quit in the middle of a major plot line and scarkill might actually get moved to the new head.
** teams get the prize just for turning up
** the screening for teams would change: oh no, this team all goes to a private school wheras this team are all from disadvantaged backgrounds (racially diverse single mothers, comp schools, council estates etc) and even though they don't know their left from their right, they should be the ones who go on.
** teams have to switch members every time one gets a question right or does something clever. because then everyone gets a chance to be on knightmare.
** all teams must be mixed and without any religous bias or it could be seen if they do well that their religon or gender plays a part and the government may have to start a new inititative.
** auditions are seen as the wrong way to select teams, as are application forms and any form of test. teams are chosen by statistic and painting numbers on goats, seeing which goat chooses to mate first. all consider this a 'fair' way of deciding.

this list is getting cut here or i will be late for work, but i may add more later.

-herself

[Pooka]

This made me laugh out loud. Seriously.

[MoanaLiza]

*head spins* Help I'm getting dizzy

** teams get the prize just for turning up...

For some reason a match between Scotland and Estonia springs to mind. Estonia didn't turn up or something to that effect if I can remember correctly.

[HStorm]

Yeah, Estonia refused to leave their hotel till they'd had their pudding, so the referee abandoned the game after three seconds. Apparently Estonian TV cameras were focused on the home dugout at the kickoff and therefore managed to mss the entire match!